So I am basically starting this blog as a place to put my own thoughts down while reading many of the other atheist and theist blogs that I read on a regular basis. While I can always respond in comments, sometimes I feel the need to move outside of that context, so here you go!
First off, a little about myself. I am 26 years old, living in the Seattle/Tacoma area, and working at a software company. My background in the whole theist/atheist debate is a bit of a complicated one, so here goes:
Age 0-10: No clue about what this God stuff was all about. My parents are not exactly the religious fundy's that a lot of people (my wife included) had to deal with growing up. Actually, quite the opposite: my dad describes himself as an existentialist (I actually think beatnik is the perfect term for him, since it grabs the existentialism and throws in his constant poetry reading lol). My mom is a hippie/civil-rights activist/volunteering advocate, who practices yoga, meditation, etc, and VEHEMENTLY disavows being associated with Christianity (though she does believe in a 'god type force' in her own words).
Age 10-14: Attended a Nazarene church with my best friend and his fundy family. I was constantly confused by what I was seeing/hearing/being taught. I remember being in the Youth group, and listening to a long diatribe about homosexuality, and wondering, in the immortal words that Eric Cartman would speak later, "What's the big fucking deal bitch??". I also remember having this book shoved at me that had all these weird quotes about hell/heaven/the devil/Jesus/etc, and not understanding why ANYONE would buy any of this stuff.
Age: 14-19: Absolute, 100% atheist. At that point, through high school, I had completely rejected religion, in all it's forms.
Age 19-22: This is hard to define. When I was in college, I had something of a 'religious' experience. Considering that I went to a religious college, this isn't surprising. I started to believe that there was SOMETHING bigger then me out there. I couldn't put my finger on what, but guided by the wonderful brain-washers around me, I decided to just call it Christianity and be done with it. I never went to church, I never truly believed that Jesus was divine (which is a pretty important part of Xianity)... I just believed there was something bigger then me. At the same time that I was going through all this, I was in pursuit of my Philosophy degree, so I was being exposed to all of the famous Philosophers that are quoted constantly throughout theist and atheist blogs. I read them from top to bottom, left to right.
At the same time, I was discussing religion with my wife, who was going through her own 'spiritual crisis', having come from a fundy family, and finding that what she was taught didn't always jive with how she felt about life. Homosexuality was hard for her, since she had no problem with it, but her family are raving bigots in this regard. Sex before marriage was another big one, since she firmly believed that if her God was a loving God, and she did believe that, here was no reason that God would have a problem with she and I sharing that, regardless of the marriage question. Finally, she was having a REAL issue with the idea of the Xian afterlife, since she was wrestling with the question of what would happen if she or I died, and the surviving one re-married: what would that mean when we met up in the Xian version of heaven?
Take all of that, throw it in a blender, and you had my head for that period of time.
Age 22-current: So, where did I go from there, and where am I now? Well, I finally resolved a few things for myself. I realized that I WAS still an atheist (and still am), and still am. So what does that mean for my whole 'there is something larger then me' feeling? It's still there, but I've realized what it is (there are a couple different things): natural forces (weather, the tides, nature in general that humans can't tame no matter how hard we try); and collective human experience (which in the end is so much bigger then any one of us). These two things are bigger then any one human being... but they AREN'T spiritual!!! They are just real concrete things. I also was wrestling with the ideas of existentialism, which I tend to think are more accurate then a lot of philosophies. I for one agree with Jean-Paul Sartre, when he asserts that there is NO SUCH THING as a priori knowledge. There are instincts, but unless you stretch it, those can hardly be called knowledge.
I also started to think about relativism (here's the meat and point of this long winded post), and I came to consider myself a relativist. I simply couldn't buy that any moral code was the 'right' one... to me, the differences in moral codes were simply the outcroppings of cultural, social, political, differences. Any time someone appeals to an authority around me, I HAVE to ask them what makes their 'authority' 'right'? But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that relativism is really an untenable position in the end. The statement alone, "everything is relative" is a contradiction, and there really is no way of describing relativism that doesn't come out sounding non-sensical ("I kind of think that maybe relativism is absolute, but I reserve the right to be wrong."... just doesn't work that well, does it).
So back to the point of this post. I was reading Aaron Kinney's blog, which is an excellent piece of work from someone who has obviously long considered their position, and I keep sticking on one point. Aaron is arguing from a standpoint (if I'm reading him correctly), of 'morality from self-interest'. In other words, when we act in a moral manner, we are doing so because it's in our own self-interest to do so.
An example I always like to give for this argument is that of committing murder. Why wouldn't I kill someone? Well, from the argument Aaron is making, at the very basic level, I wouldn't kill someone because of the consequences. It's in my best interest to not go to jail, so I better not kill someone. Self-interest.
While I think that Aaron is right to a degree, I don't think that this is necessarily the best argument against a relativist point of view. My question to the self-interest argument would be this: why do people give their lives for another being? I would take a bullet for my wife, in a heartbeat. This really has nothing to do with my own self-interest. If I die, it doesn't do me any good now does it? My own self-interest would be to live, not to give my life for another human being.
I really have come to think that humans act from an overlapping circle theory of interest, not just self-interest. It goes like this:

As you can see, I've constructed (badly I know) an diagram of various kinds of 'interest' that we feel. I think that the black mark in the middle is where 90% of our morality comes from. With this construction, I can answer the question of self-sacrifice: I do it because it falls into the familial interest category.
Granted, my three category titles may be a bit vague, but I'm making the point that, yes, we do get our morality from -interest... but self-interest isn't the only -interest that we draw it from. I might give my life for my wife, so that she can live and continue to have a good life. This doesn't really do me any good, since I'll be worm bait at that point, but it's a moral choice that I'm comfortable making from an -interest standpoint.
hopefully that didn't confuse you all too much!!!
-olly